Make It Count

During these grey months, I often need reminders to help stay cheerful and positive. This Nike 'Make it Count' video is the perfect inspiration to keep my mind where it should be. It's reminded me that I need to cherish every moment. Even on a bad or rainy day, I need to be thankful for simply being alive. Death can come so quickly, so unexpectedly, I need to make the most of my time and not dwell on my past and what I don't have anymore; this happens more often than it should. Life is just too precious, and too short to get hung up on the negative. 

Turning 30

(Not yet!)

My cousin sent me this link about turning 30, and there has been one "By 30 you should know" that I have been conscious of for the past few years. It's number one.
By 30, you should know ...

1. How to fall in love without losing yourself.

In my last relationship, I completely lost myself (which is why I think I took the breakup so hard). I was embarrassed not to know who I was after we split. What were my hobbies? Who were my friends, what did I like to do with my spare time? Where did I put my energy, time, and money? Learning that you don't actually know yourself is seriously frightening and takes time, and some serious soul searching to find your inner you again. It took me approximately (maybe a little longer) three months to find me again. My strategy (totally unplanned, by the way): no computer for three months and hardly any phone usage,  unless absolutely necessary. I hid my computer under my bed and it took the place of that monster we've all been afraid of as a child. I didn't want to touch it, look at it, open it, or face any sort of social network reality. I didn't know how to deal with it because, quite simply, I didn't really know myself single! After three months of this, and after surrounding myself with amazing, inspirational people, after filling up every free minute of my day with something fun and active, I learned who I was again. And I fell in love with the person I'd become. I accepted who I was and vowed to never lose myself again, but instead to always continue to live a rich, full, vivid and colorful life. If there's one way that I could explain this strange process it was that before, I was living in black and white. But gaining so much insight, having more energy and finding where and how to channel it, I realized how truly colorful my life was becoming by practicing these new routines. I think you can only truly find yourself and gain this sort of "fresh start" after hitting a hard and nasty rock bottom. 

If you've talked to me lately or have been reading through the blog, then you probably know that it's been quite the adjustment for me moving to England. I've left behind sun, family, friends and a lifestyle that's been familiar to me my entire life. It's taken lots of time, patience, and more soul-searching dealing with my feelings and emotions I've felt over the last year, and I've had to completely readjust my way of living. On top of being newlywed, I am in a new country and everything is brand new and different. It's exciting having a new beginning, but as you can imagine, it's also terrifying, as change usually is. We have no plans for our future yet regarding where we'll live--we are trying to stay as open minded as we possibly can and not rule out any possibilities, since anything is possible! Overall though, as I reflect on my past year of living here, I've had my highs and lows, it's been a new and challenging experience for me; one that has made me work at not losing myself in it all. Thankfully, Peter and I are so very connected, and so open and honest with each other, that if I am ever feeling unbalanced, he's always happy to provide whatever I need to get back on track. 

15 Things you should give up to be happy

I found this next site on facebook and a couple of these "things to give up" kind of struck a chord with me. The few I've practiced working on are: to stop complaining, giving up resistance to change, giving up the past, and giving up attachment. 

Complaining. Who doesn't complain? It's way too easy to do. For me, it's mostly been about the change in weather. Heck, half of my blog is dedicated to my complaining about the weather! But alas, it's no good complaining about something you have no control over.

Resistance to change. We've all been through it, and as I've said before, it's scary! It's hard to change, especially when you can't let go of the past. Which leads me to...

Give up the past.

"I know, I know. It’s hard. Especially when the past looks so much better than the present and the future looks so frightening, but you have to take into consideration the fact that the present moment is all you have and all you will ever have. The past you are now longing for – the past that you are now dreaming about – was ignored by you when it was present. Stop deluding yourself. Be present in everything you do and enjoy life. After all life is a journey not a destination. Have a clear vision for the future, prepare yourself, but always be present in the now."

I will admit, this is my biggest struggle! It's too easy to forget that when you were living in this 'past you can't let go of', you didn't stop to appreciate it enough. You didn't realize you'd miss it so much. This realization and struggle has really motivated me to stop focusing on what I left behind and pay more attention to what I have right in front of me, here. I am very happy here and have so many things to be thankful for--I just need to tuck my past away into a special folder in my memory.

Give up attachment. This is a tough one when a lot of my past attachments are at home and I constantly long for them. They span from people (family and friends), to hobbies (mostly hiking, racquetball, scenic runs) to food (the variety & having special meals with friends). Attachments create routines and it's a challenge to start brand new routines.

These are my goals, written. 'Til next time.

Venezia

I can't believe it's already been two months since our trip to Venice! I was so excited with the way we planned this trip because it was so spontaneous of us! Since we have x amount of bills to pay, debts, and savings to worry about each month, we had talked about a little getaway since my homesickness was at a peak in winter, but never really moved forward with that plan. Then for a few days in February, we talked about where we would go if we could and decided it would have to be Venice! On Leap Day (Feb 29), EasyJet was having a big sale on their flights and we found a really good deal to Venice and just went for it!! It was literally something we'd discussed for just a few days before booking. Ironically, our plan was (still...) to get away from the miserable gloom that is English weather, but lo and behold, the weather predicted rain and thunderstorms just before we left! Nonetheless, it's all about the experience, which is really what I should keep reminding myself in the meantime about living here! 

We had been really anxious for the entire three months leading up to the trip. We found this adorable apartment to stay in and had been in touch with the owner in the months prior to our stay. We'd researched restaurants and gelato shops (none of which we actually went to) and did a little studying and practicing of the beautiful Italian language. This was also going to be our very first flight together!! :-) Kinda crazy, right?!

When we arrived, we paid for our extortionately priced bus and vaporetto tickets (more on this later), and made our way to the gorgeous island of Venice. My first feelings about this incredible place reminded me of the way I feel when I'm at Disneyland. A blissful, romantic feeling completely overwhelmed me, despite the gloomy, misty weather.  As we tried finding our vaporetto route, we were told the America's Cup was currently happening (not sure how we didn't know about this!), so we weren't able to get off where our apartment was. Turned out, it was actually happening right in front of our apartment which was pretty exciting!! Luckily we took an early flight from Gatwick and it was only about 1:00pm when we got to our apartment so we had plenty of the day left to explore (and eat!).

We had decided that 200 Euros would hopefully be enough to get us through the few days we were there, but we were proved wrong pretty quickly. When we'd arrived at the airport, we paid for our return bus tickets, and 12 hour vaporetto (waterbus) tickets to get us to our apartment once on the Island, and for both of us, this came to 55 Euros. Ouch. I had been told that Venice was expensive but I didn't take it into serious enough consideration, clearly! Because it's such a tourist trap, shops and restaurants get away with and take full advantage of ripping you off. Peter and I do pretty well on a tight budget and tend to go for the cheaper options, but even the cheapest option in Venice is still ridiculous and it became really hard for me to wrap my head around and justify. That being said, we couldn't really afford much other than food.

I thought our apartment was located in the perfect part of Venice. It wasn't in the crazy hustle and bustle  where all the annoying tourists lurk, but it was just on the outskirts where some of the locals live. One downside of it being such a tourist trap is that it's actually a challenge to find locals and listen to them speak or watch them live their day-to-day lives. I really enjoyed that part with where we stayed-- we could see everyone's laundry hung above us just outside the door to our entrance, and we could hear the locals walking by daily.

We spent a lot of time getting lost and did a lot less planning than I wanted to. The walk from our apartment to St. Mark's Square was about 15 minutes, so we wandered up that way everyday and used it as our landmark. One of the days turned out to be ridiculously rainy and wet, so much so, that when we got home, we had to peel our clothes off and lay them on the heater to dry them out. We stopped in a cafe that day, hopeful that the rain would die down, and when it didn't, we popped into a shop, bought a pack of playing cards and headed back to our place to let it pass. It turned out to be the perfect opportunity to rest our feet since we'd been walking and exploring non-stop. 

Although the restaurants are too overpriced for me, the quality and taste of proper Italian food is more than enough for me to go back. I don't think I have ever wanted pizza as much as I did in the few days we were in Venice. The great thing about that is there are little carts/shops all over where you can pick up a slice to go for about 1,50-2 euros and the slices are massive!! As a bonus, I was overjoyed to find my most favorite toppings everywhere!!! Prosciutto & artichokes=heaven! (Artichokes are all over, which is heaven in itself for me!) It's been far too long since I've had some variety in food and Italy was the best place to indulge in that. Of course we also had to stop for a few gelatos...my favorite being pistachio, surprise surprise! Overall, the food is simply to die for and I certainly look forward to my next visit to that beautiful, delicious country!

Putting the gloomy weather aside, the over-priced (but extremely delicious) food, and a few minor flaws in our apartment (two single beds put together to make one which wasn't very comfortable to say the least), I must admit that it was such a perfect getaway for us and I know we'll go back one day when we can afford to spend out a little bit more. It was the perfect excuse for Peter and I to put our phones away and focus on each other and let the romance-filled air totally consume us. I felt so much closer to him and could actually feel the growth we'd made together from those few days away in that gorgeous city of love.

Watch our video below!

Venice from Lindsay Reynolds on Vimeo.