What I got when I didn't get the job

A few weeks ago, I saw what I thought was my DREAM JOB being advertised. In a hurry, I printed off the job description and person spec requirements and was giddy to see that I seemed to tick all / most of the boxes. I thought the criteria for said dream job would be strict. As in, super-challenging, no chance, keep on dreaming.

After reading the best book ever around 6 months ago, my job-seeking mind was forever changed. I now understand that job-hunting is more about life hunting than just finding a job that works around your financial goals. The job hunt should MOSTLY be about doing research for yourself: figuring out whether this is the job FOR YOU - and if it suits your life/lifestyle and uses your favorite skills and knowledge. Will everything about this job make you happy and keep you excited? The manager, the environment, the workload, the challenges - these should always be on your mind while job-hunting because they are almost more important and will make a greater impact on your life than actually getting and doing the job. Just think about how many hours a day/week/month/year we put in to our jobs...it is so important to make sure you're investing in the right job for you.

The book includes some fascinating statistics such as success rates for job-hunting:

• Looking for employers’ job-postings on the Internet = 4-10% success rate
• Answering local newspaper ads = 5-24% success rate
• Going to private employment agencies or search firms for help = 5-28% success rate
• Asking for job-leads from family & friends = 33% success rate
• Knocking on the door of an employer, whether they have a vacancy or not = 47% success rate
• Doing extensive homework on yourself = 86% success rate

It should be no surprise to you that half of the book is dedicated towards helping you do the super hefty, in-depth, dreaded homework on yourself. But as you can see from the stats above, it's worth it. And you'll find that homework invaluable during an interview. 

Thanks to my book, I understood that I needed to do research on the job, the Trust, the environment and everything else to know if it was suitable for me. I got in touch with the recruiting manager and current post-holder to find out more about the role, the expectations, challenges, etc and coincidentally it was when I was on the phone with the current post-holder that I received the invitation to interview! I let the research continue. I read into the programme, the trust and the bases to know as much as I could (for personal investment and also for interview preparation, which proved handy as they did ask what I knew!). 

I also learned how to fully prepare. Beyond doing the research on them and the homework on myself, I studied potential interview questions and perfected my answers. I asked experts for advice and asked what kind of questions they have been asked. Having all of this prep under my belt, I felt confident. But as each day got closer, I had to keep reminding myself to stay calm and relaxed as I could feel the anxiety creeping in. This preparation was starting to remind me of the way you feel just before you get on a scary ride. You get in the long line knowing you still have a long time before you have to start worrying about getting on. As it gets closer though, the butterflies come and you're excited. and scared. During the ride you're still scared, but having a blast and you get off the ride saying "let's do that again!" I was crossing my fingers that the end of the interview would be similar. 

The morning of the interview is when the magic happened.

It's when I realised I couldn't have actually been more prepared than I already was. 

I arrived half an hour early and walked around the building for about 15 minutes rehearsing the answers to "tell us about yourself, tell us why you want this job and tell us what you know about us." 

And then during my walk into the building, I surprised myself by giving myself an unexpected pep-talk. I don't think I'd ever done one of these before, but I was glad I did because it really helped. I told myself what I already knew. That I was well-prepared. Well-rehearsed. To relax, to just be myself and let everything naturally unfold. 

The interview went well. I was confident that I had said what I wanted to and also felt that I made the impression I wanted to. I left feeling positive and proud of all my hard work. And for some reason, I was less nervous about this phone call than any other. (I think because I'd done my best).

Although I didn't get the job in the end (I was told that I was their top choice all day until the last candidate who was internal with more managing experience in the Trust), I reminded myself to stay positive. I reminded myself -
That we remember the scary stuff. That if you're not failing, then you're not trying hard enough. 

That it was a great experience for me from beginning to end. 

That I had the opportunity to meet new people and learned more about myself, the trust and the programme. 

That I now had the experience of one more interview under my belt which will hopefully show in my next. 

That I know how to give myself an effective pep talk!

That I still received great feedback.

That despite being a popular post with lots of interest, I was shortlisted, interviewed, AND their top choice for most of the day!! 

So, all in all, although heartbreaking for a while, it was a good lesson and great experience.

A note to my other half

How did I get so lucky?! To find everything I've ever wanted in you. 
I know we say it often, but I'm so happy that we know just how lucky we have been to find each other. We just fit. Our personalities, our dreams and goals.

Thank you.

For being my rock & my support. For putting up with me during the rough times, for pushing me and being my biggest cheerleader. I know I am far from perfect, so thank you for understanding and loving me anyway. I hope I make you a proud friend and husband.

I must have done something really wonderful to deserve you. To me, you are a marvel. I love to watch you and could stare at you forever. I love to watch you grow, in life, in passion and in love. 

I love your big heart and soul and the way it speaks out to me. 

My favorite spot is right in your arms, where I feel the safest. Thank you for keeping them open for me.

I can't wait for our kids, someday, to see our love for each other and to teach them our love language. For them to see the way you look at me, so deep in love. The way you touch me, and the way I can't fall asleep without touching you. They will know real love when they watch us, and I'll trust them and be so proud of them when they find it one day too. I want them to follow their hearts and trust fate, the way we did. If people say it's too soon or call them crazy, I hope they'll listen to their hearts the way their parents did.

Those babies of ours...they'll come one day. And those days will be rough, but they'll be amazing and worth it all. I can't wait to love them and watch your heart open and grow for them! They will adore you, the same way their mama does. I can just imagine you making them laugh the way you make me laugh.

Happy three years of marriage, my sweet boy! It's been such a fun ride so far, and we still have the best yet to come. I can't wait.

Love you so much!

New Year!

Highlights of 2013: 
- Mom & Loyd got hitched! 
- Secret Cinema: Shawshank Redemption
- WE GOT A DRYER!
- Took an Adobe Illustrator course at Canterbury College
- Our trip to Alghero, Sardinia in June
- Normandy with the family in August
- Moving to our cozy flat in Wingham
- Passing my life in the UK test
- Getting my residence permit!
- Cat & Andrew's wedding blessing 
- Snow on my birthday
- Almond's visit
- Andy & Ryann's visit
- Took a knitting class
- Seeing Lewis & his documentary in the Raindance Film Festival 
- Filming Carla & Damien's wedding
- Taking small steps in building a company; registration, name and logo
- Making new, good friends 
- Had a satisfying number of Chocolate cafe dates with Kamila
- Got a Sword & Plough bag
- Ice skating at Somerset House in London
- Peter's hard work paid off in the London Marathon!
- Our 60 mi charity bike ride
- Boating around Hever Castle
- My new Canon 550d DSLR
- 5th November fireworks at Leeds Castle
- our day trip to Rye & Battle
- becoming English Heritage members!!

Hopes for 2014:
- call both sets of grandparents more often
- find somewhere to volunteer regularly
- stay fit, active and healthy
- eat healthier, less junk.
- focus on our debt this year & make big dents
- Say thank you to Peter more 
- Put our relationship first. Grow deeper & never stop learning and loving
- Break routine more often
- Make more effort to facetime family and friends
- Spend less time in front of the TV & more time reading
- Arrange monthly date nights
- More quiet time without any electronics
- Take more pictures!
- Continue to notice, observe and appreciate the small things.

2013 in pictures

Come on, ya'll

For a really long time, I'd been wanting to try Insanity...I guess I waited so long to try because I was secretly terrified that I wouldn't be able to do it. I don't know why because I used to do crazy Sean's bootcamp class at the gym (he claimed you would lose 1000 calories in 1 hr) and I would still be there at the end of the class when he counted the number of people who'd left. 

I finally downloaded it and since now we're in our own place, I decided to try it out. Lovely winter makes for really dark evenings which make me really want to go straight home after work - and not straight to the gym. So that is one of many reasons I'm now in love with Insanity, I can come home after work but still get a really good, tough workout and have our dinner either ready or cooking during my workout and just head upstairs for a shower - it's perfect.

I started off with the first video (obviously): the fit test. I managed to do it but I was really surprised (and disappointed) by how sore I was for the next few days following. It make sense though, at the gym I would just run and bike. No abs, nothing else. And Insanity works e v e r y thing, especially abs.

After a week into the videos, I realized I was supposed to be going in a specific order, oops. So I started over and it was only a few days until I could really see and feel the results. They feel immediate. The workouts are so intense that you just feel so darn good after. And then you can feel your body changing and suddenly your clothes fit and then eventually become too baggy (hooray!). 

Since I started Insanity, I haven't been back to the gym, not once. And that's simply because I get a better workout with Shaun T and feel that I push myself 10 times harder than I would at the gym. I do miss seeing certain people and miss my bike, but I love what Insanity does to my drive and obviously, my body. I just don't dread working out now like I would at the gym. I actually look forward to the challenge now because I know what it does to my body.

When Peter first heard I was going to start an at-home workout DVD, he immediately put it down. He was also becoming slightly obsessed with the gym...but, once he realized how intense the workouts are, he joined me! And now, he's addicted, probably a teeny bit more than I am. He still goes to the gym occasionally to work on weights, but on a typical evening, you will see our house transform into a workout studio for about an hour. Before our Christmas tree was inside, we'd workout side by side (seriously dangerous because this sometimes causes random laughing fits) but now, he goes in front of our couch and I go behind - I had to make the move during globe jumps when he was going way too quickly, and it's also hard to do moving push ups when you're side by side.

So, if you've heard good things about Insanity, I urge you to try it out. If you do, bear in mind, that it is hard. But, you can do it! And I promise you, after 1-2 weeks, you will be SO much stronger than when you started off (which you'll realize during your fit tests), but that strength is going to get you through each drill and soon they'll feel much easier.

We have a love/hate relationship with Shaun T, sometimes we curse him but most of the times we laugh at him and his silly comments/phrases. As silly as it sounds though, I'm grateful to have found something that works so well for both of us and to have a good, challenging workout that we both look forward to.